Really?? Part 3

Grooming habits should be kept private. Period. When a person decides to share these habits with the public, it makes one say ‘Really?? Are you kidding me?” Honestly, it’s nasty.

I used to work for what I would equate to an insurance “sweatshop”. My husband was laid off from his job quite a few years ago and our youngest was riddled with health issues. It was not a time to be without health insurance, just in case we really needed it. So, as my husband made his way through the job search ocean, I went back to work for a medical claims processing company. It was horrible. Employees would clock in with a “Morning.” and clock out with a “Night.” Most would wear headphones and listen to music with no interaction with anyone. Being a social person, the monotony was brutal. If I removed myself from the life sucking vortex of the computer screen long enough to rub life back into my eyes, all I could really hear was the constant tapping of 100+ computer keys. The only sound that could rip through that white noise was the clip-clip-clip of someone cutting their fingernails. It wasn’t just a ‘let me fix this hangnail’ kind of thing, it was all ten fingers and I swear maybe some toes. Every other day, my stomach would turn when I heard that noise. I could not find the culprit at first but did not have to wait long to find the pile of nail clippings alongside the wall of someone’s cubicle. So that I would not vomit at the thought of hearing that again, I brought in my own set of headphones and became another drone; only I listened to books on tape rather than music. I believe I made it through 12 books by the time my husband found a job and I happily gave my resignation.

I recently witnessed another faux-pas at a very public event. I would say that this habit is something I see most often and sorry to say it fellas, but you are 9 times out of 10 the offender. I was standing in a “food room” and helping myself to a cup of soup when walking toward me was a group of 4 college guys. One in particular had his finger so far up his nose that I didn’t think could be possible. He dug for a few seconds, but I looked at him with a “Ewww” look. He was oblivious to both my look and his action that was prompting my facial contortion. It made me think of Jerry Seinfeld saying “It wasn’t a pick!” As a viewer, we all knew that; but from the angle seen by his latest lady friend, it most definitely was a pick. There was no mistaking this either because it was a full frontal view for all to see. This happens as I am in traffic too. As I drive by guys in a car or see them at a red light, they are picking away. Do you not realize that I can see you? You are not invisible when you do that! I didn’t eat for the rest of the day from that room and stuck to my nicely wrapped granola bar stashed in my coat pocket.

Over the summer I had a friend share his experience of a “Really?” category. He mentioned that I should use it for one of my blog posts. Well, Dan here it is!
Dan was at a gas station and fueling up for the day when he noticed something that didn’t quite register at first. The person close by, also filling up their gas tank was brushing their teeth. When would you ever feel the need to load up the toothbrush with paste of your choice and use bottled water to rinse and spit? Most rest areas have bathrooms that you could use. If you forget to do this most basic thing in the morning, buy some gum. This is not a good example of multi-tasking; it’s just gross!

All of these things cannot be hidden by the Harry Potter’s Cloak of Invisibility. It’s not real, unless you are a character in the book. All of these personal grooming habits should be kept in the privacy of your own bathroom. I don’t want to hear your clippers or see if you can make it to the next knuckle on your pointer digit or jump out of the way of your Colgate swill. Take note all public hygiene offenders: I just heard on the news that today is the official “Global Hand Washing Day”.

Thank goodness.